There are many admirable traits that are used to describe introversion such as introverts are creative, intelligent and independent souls with a gentle heart. However, despite all these good traits, not all is good for an introvert. There’s also the opposite side of the coin that often gets dismissed by others but is just as part of an introvert’s identity. The dark side accounts for these undesirable traits that tends to materialise when an introvert is under stress and needs to go in self isolation mode.
*Before we proceed I’d like to remind you that if you’re an introvert and you relate to any of these signs please don’t take this feedback as an attack on your character. This blog post is meant to be a self improvement guide for those of you who have being feeling a little stuck or those who want to learn more about themselves.*
Here are seven dark traits of introverts.
- Self depreciation
Introverts are hard on themselves. Research has shown that introverts are naturally more self critical compared to others. Being critical is like planting and watering a bad seed in your mind. They end up fixating on the negative and neglecting all the other positive traits that form their identity. In the end this only causes their self esteem and self confidence to worsen. So if you catch yourself saying something really negative to yourself try to challenge those thoughts and remind yourself of all your amazing qualities because you are amazing.
- Bad attitude towards teamwork
Introverts often find themselves hating teamwork. Perhaps they think the quality of the work they produce is diluted by the group or they believe that working as a team only means drama, conflicts and arguments. Being in a group setting can also feel draining so they might find themselves always going solo but it doesn’t always have to be that way. In the end, teamwork can be more powerful and lead to greater results when everyone is compatible with each other and can communicate in a healthy way.
Have you ever spent hours mulling over something that happened in the past for hours on end? Overthinking is a scientifically backed up curse for introverts (no pun intended). According to researchers, introverts have higher levels of electrical activity in their brains both at rest and when doing a stimulated activity. Overthinking isn’t only limited to the analytical side of the brain but it can also affect your emotional state and make you feel emotions much more deeply. This explains why you find many introverts being HSPs. Thus, the next time you catch yourself feeling overwhelmed because you’re overthinking something, you may want to journal, have an interesting conversation with a trusted friend, take a walk or even cry to help calm your overthinking mind.
As an introvert do you tend to focus more on the negative side of things than the positive? Personality research shows that extroverts show higher level of optimism than introverts. While this may come across as a bad thing for introverts it’s important to know that extroverts are prone to be more optimistic about ‘unwise’ ideas like continuing to smoke but the hope of quitting even if realistically they won’t. In contrast, introverts tend to be more grounded and realistic but this may sometimes boarder to a despairing type of negativity if left unchecked. This is why it’s important to strike a balance between being positive and being realistic.
- Bottling up emotions
There’s a time in everyone’s life where they felt wronged by someone but kept silent the whole time? It’s no secret introverts prefer staying quiet. Confrontations can be a scary thing after all but the negative aspect of this is that sometimes you end up bottling all of your feelings until it becomes too overwhelming. During these cases it’s important that you have an outlet to address how you really feel. It could be journaling, talking to a friend or opening up to a therapist. Expressing how you feel can help bring you to a calm and more peaceful state of mind afterwards.
- Loss of identity
Have you ever felt like you’re absorbing the personalities of the people around you? And no I’m not referring to behaving like the main character of a Netflix show you just watched. Many introverts are highly sensitive people, some may even be empaths. This may lead them to absorb the emotions and feelings of the people they’re around even if they don’t notice it themselves. Although it may seem harmless introverts can end up overwhelming themselves and losing their own sense of identity and how they feel. Therefore if you find that this point is applicable to you, you may want to establish some boundaries in your relationships to help keep you grounded in yourself and your beliefs.
- Cutting off contacts
Have you ever ghosted someone before? Intentionally cutting contact with someone is an avoidance technique. It shows complete lack of concern for the other person and can cause great emotional harm to them. While introverts may not do this on purpose, their tendency to self isolate can be misinterpreted by others in a lot of ways. It may even spiral into the end of some friendships because the other party thought you ghosted them. So as much as you enjoy spending time by yourself, it’s always a good idea to check on your friends every so often to make sure you haven’t left them hanging.
*Remember that these traits only describes a single dimension of introverts. Everyone has their own set of flaws and also the agency to improve themselves.*
I hope this helps you and everyone else who reads this. If you’d want me to write on a topic that bothers you or anything you’d generally want me to write on please reach out to me using any of my social media buttons. Also I’d love to know your thoughts on this article and where you might agree or disagree. All entries are exclusively between myself and you, thank you and be saf